Heterotopie

2012-01-25T03:33:00.002+03:30

My biggest achievement today is discovering and successfully taking out an eyelash that stuck to in my eye.

2011-12-06T04:23:00.006+03:30

کم رنگ می شوی، کم رنگ، کم رنگ

درخت هست، سیب است، باران است و دستگاه تهویه هوا تا در زمستان برف را نظاره کنیم از پشت پنجره های بخار گرفته. و سرما باشد فقط برای درختان و کف خیابان

سردرگم یک کلمه است یا سه کلمه؟

و رنجی که می کشیم از استواری، چون واقعیت ما مقاوم نیست، مقاومت می کنیم تا دیگران رنج مان ندهند، به همه حق می دهیم تا دمکراسی ای که دیگران ایجاد کرده اند بر پا باشد

به همه حق می دهیم، کلافه نمی شویم، با مشت به دهان کسی نمی کوبیم، به همه گوش می دهیم، صبر را تمرین می کنیم، پاسخ نمی دهیم، رنج نمی کشیم، تا آخر تمام این رنج نکشیدن ها رنجمان می دهد

به خستگی این بازی ها نگاه می کنیم. خاطراتی که ورق می خورد تا ما نوشته شویم. و انرژی های تلف شده زمان را مصرف می کنند. حرف های ناگفته در سکوت زمان خفه می شوند. حرف های ناگفته خیال پردازی یک رویا را شکل می دهند. تا واقعیت جارزده در مخفی گاه خیال ما رنگ بازد، محو شود

گریزی نیست، زنده ایم و زنده گی هست و سیب و سیب زمینی و سیب زمینی شیرین و آسمان و ابرها که خورشید را پنهان می کنند و پرده ها که پنجره را می پوشانند، خیابان را می پوشانند، ماشین ها را می پوشانند و خورشید را

اما صدای ماشین ها هنوز هست، و همهمه خیابان، خورشید که ساکت است حتی شنیده هم نمی شود

و وزوز مگسی سکوت این جا را آشفته می کند

و مهری که نمی خواهی و توجهی که نمی خواهی پیوسته است

این چه ترسی است که محبت را پس می زند؟

2011-12-06T01:48:00.002+03:30

اندیشه ی روز دیدار دوباره

بین ما به درازای یک زندگی فاصله افتاده است

در آغوشت فشرده می شوم

.تا چانه ات موهایم را نوازش کند

2011-11-27T23:30:00.002+03:30

All you need is a spoonful of sugar in your coffee. Take it!

2011-11-22T22:13:00.003+03:30

You are like a water,

Pure and clear

You are a water

That turns of fire

I am the fire.

2011-11-15T08:15:00.001+03:30

مفاهیم تکراری غمگین،

زمانی‌ که می‌گذرد به هر نفسی‌

که ما می کشیم.

ما و تنهائی‌ انتخاب شده یمان

زندگی‌ های ایده‌آل داروینی

و مفاهیم عوض شده

با نفسی که می کشیم

ما باهم تنهاییم.

یاد می گیریم

مفاهیم تکراری را

یاد می گیریم مفاهیم عوض شده را

و قلب ما با شادی‌های کوچک

لبخند می زند

ذهن ما با توهم یک سفسطه

خیال پردازی می‌کند

تا مفاهیم تکراری

با هر نفسی که می کشیم

تکرار شوند

عوض شوند.

2011-11-15T00:29:00.000+03:30

Leaves are red

Trees are naked

Leaves are yellow

Trees are naked

Leaves are orange

Birds are singing

Wind is blowing

Trees are dancing

Grasses are green

Trees are naked

Grasses are orange

Grasses are red

Leaves-covered grasses and taste of mischievous pomegranate stains

Lonesome birds

Electric poles

Clouds are flying

Sky is changing color

Life is silent.

2011-11-07T20:21:00.001+03:30

The story of dessert-appetizing movies:

I was graving dessert when I watched Sweet and Lowdown.

I was graving dessert when I watched Manhattan.

I was graving dessert when I watch Midnight in Paris.

A dessert that was served in a white plate in room with dazzling light and crimson curtain

ps. I found this note while cleaning up my desktop!

2011-11-07T20:17:00.001+03:30

A dreadful moment of losing a mapping between syntax and semantics of language, believe me I was listening but, it was only structures that I perceived.

2011-08-11T11:34:00.002+04:30

پیرمرد زیر درخت نشسته، پیر می‌‌شد. زمان برایش دیر نمی‌شد.

قدم‌های من که با زمان مسابقه می‌‌دادند، به پیرمرد لبخند زدند.

پیرمرد را بوسیدم. سپیده دم، سایه‌های هر چند تاریک را تهدید می‌‌کرد.

2011-07-21T22:40:00.001+04:30

Vertigoes of Associations:

Oh, let’s blame the Asians and their expensive camera with their millions of lenses, walking around taking pictures of every single possible thing. Yeah, I do not even know if they are the reason that I have never felt like buying a super expensive camera and millions of lenses or it is me being a poor graduate student who does not have money to afford buying a super expensive camera and millions of lenses. Oh, no, I am sure it is Asians; money has nothing to do with this. I do not feel being myself if I buy a super expensive camera and millions of lenses, though I am not going to walk around taking pictures of every single possible thing, if I buy a super expensive camera and millions of lenses. Well, who knows? I will probably start walking around and taking pictures of every single possible thing. I will probably buy one of those infinite size external hard drives that Asians have. I will copy all of images that I took of the every single possible thing in it with their original size. I will probably lose all of my body hairs (at least most of it). I will have the Asian eyes. I will dress up like Asians and walk around like Asians. I will move to Silicon Valley and eat Asian food every day.

2011-07-17T20:57:00.003+04:30

و اگر تهران بود

من در باغ ملی‌ بودم

پیاده رفته بودم، از تئاتر شهر تا مجلس سابق، موزه ی قرآن فعلی

اما نه، از شلوغی جمهوری نتوان گذشت، پس داخل جمهوری می‌‌شدم، از روپوش ها و لوازم پزشکی‌ بی‌ اعتنا رد می‌‌شدم

سینما ی آبی رنگ و صندلی‌های ناراحتش

می‌ رفتم تا فردوسی‌، ممکن بود از حافظ به پائین بپیچم، ولی‌ نه می‌‌رفتم تا فردوسی‌

از حافظ تا فردوسی همهمهٔ جمهوری هم گم می‌‌شود

دو بزرگراه روی هم می‌‌آیند، من زیر یکی‌ و در پیاده روی دیگری ماشین‌ها را گوش می‌‌دهم

به تقاطع می‌رسم، قد بلند می‌کنم دستم چپم روی پیشانی می‌‌گذارم، سعی‌ می‌کنم فردوسی را ببینم

اما نمی‌شود، میدان از تقاطع دیده نمی‌شو

می‌ روم تا میدان توپ خانه، خیابان سپه

ناگهان همه‌چیز نزدیک می‌‌شود، کاخِ گلستان، پارک شهر، بازار تهران

نه فراموش نکرده ام

به باغ مللی می‌‌روم

.به اتاق آیینه ها

2011-07-14T20:31:00.001+04:30

just beautiful what it is:

"This world is spinning around me

This world is spinning without me
Every day sends future to past
Every breath leaves one less to my last"

2011-07-11T22:18:00.005+04:30

buy a green shirt with lots of black feathers printed onto it (written by a left hand of a right-handed person).

I was looking at street through the walls of window from my laptop monitor, people come and people go. I like the reflect. Workers working across the street. An old acquaintance is coming in. I wonder if she recalls me. It has been long time and I feel I look different enough. She remembers me, we say hi and chat. I am happy to see her.

Sometimes it takes weeks of procrastination to get a day of work done. Sometimes it is hard to feel like an stranger. Sometimes I recall lonesomeness when I feel like an stranger. Sometimes it is only a matter of more or less sugar. Sometime it takes too long and some times are too short.

2011-06-08T02:11:00.003+04:30

Too light to blow in wind

Too heavy to float in the creek

Too strange to communicate

So, let’s walk in the street of blackberry carpet

Let’s look for a palm tree.

A Blondie missing in her 20, a flyer on beside table says so. Korean words around the next table can be related to her too.

They are all too young to be parent, especially this dude with tattoo of gun and deck of cards on his right arm, but here is America.

The dude with tattoo has no kid, but I heard he converted to Islam recently. So apparently no more messing around for him, he is looking for a wife and family. He is definitely too young to be a parent, as young as a deck of card and a gun he has on his arm.

I dedicate this chapter to an old lady she lives across the street. She and a black skirt that she always had it on ,in winter and summer, always no sucks. I was worried for her to get cold in winter. She somehow reminds me of my grandma. I guess they resemble a lot in their shape. Whenever I see her from my living room window, she is coming back home with her grocery bag. It is a bit uncanny; every description that I am going to make about her will come with always or it has a stable or monotonic meaning in it, though I just saw her very few times through my living room window. We never talk; I wish I could say hi to her once or at least wave hands through my living window. But, she never looks across the street. She always carries her grocery bag, locks her car, walks up the stairs and enters into her house.

2011-05-29T00:20:00.003+04:30

I learn a word about how I behaved and now I know how I felt!

2011-05-23T01:58:00.000+04:30

Here I am, sitting in a coffee shop, trying to write, looking for a word, looking for a gum.

A word to describe a concept, a word to replace a set of words that I wrote to describe the concept.

A gum to chew, Aye, I also like the fresh flavor in my mouth.

Here I am, force to listen to the music that plays in the coffee shop, thinking how many people have a peace of food stuck up in their teeth.

2011-05-19T02:05:00.003+04:30

I am not telling you what you want to hear.

I am not giving you advise.

I do not judge you.

I am just trying to help you ponder other possible aspects that you may not think of.

2011-03-07T00:21:00.000+03:30

کاش بود

و دفتری

زیر آفتاب

بر سکوت کلمات خیره می‌‌شدیم

و قلمی

و لبانت به قهوه طعم می‌‌گرفت

چه ساده می‌‌نوشتیم

خاطره ی بودن را

2010-07-08T18:05:00.003+04:30

lagoon is by the sea but it cannot reach it, that is such a sad reality!
At least lagoon knows there is such a thing called sea, swamp even do not know about it. All swamp can see is shrubs and trees .
Well, I actually like forest better than beach.

2010-07-07T21:17:00.005+04:30

I am an ocean, the one who used to be a sky. You are still the same stranger.
I am the ocean, I dedicate my shore to the seagulls. The birds who speak the language that no human can speak.

2010-06-28T18:25:00.006+04:30

last week of June, I entered in to the world that everything was shouting life is so beautiful. I acknowledge that. In Samos Island, life is to live. I wanted to live it. It was not just some beautiful place. The whole chemistry was different. I wonder if it is Mediterranean breeze or a Greek touch. Also, if you die there you would bury in the mountain and face to ocean. Wow, mountain, I biked about forty minutes all over the mountain in Samos Island to see the ancient Tunnel that made in 15 bc. I cannot beleive how I made it through to the mountain. That was tough.

I receive two history lesson, one from Asian-american professor in Virginia. The other from local restaurant owner who was happy to have green restaurant by producing all of the veggie and not using any chemical ingredient. He was green and bright. He remember all of the history from the school. Other Greek person also talk to me about the Persian-Greek history before. I was kind of embarrassed knowing less than them. They even know the name of the Persian kings' wife. Well, not only our history class is sucks in Iran, it gave me a very wrong impression about studying the history. Indeed, I should say analytical history is pretty dense and interesting.

Greek has many thing similar to Turkey such as the coffee, kabab, Ouzo and Tsipouro. They call the Turkish coffee , Greek coffee or Arab coffee. One of them emphasized to me the pots are imported from Egypt and the good one should be made in copper. Aluminum or Steel coffee pots are sound like such a scandal in coffee making. Ouzo (Greek alcohol) also looks Turkish alcohol (Raki). But, it is better not talk to about Turkish similarity there. There is lots similarity with Persian that they are happily talk about, some examples from food are dolma, stuffed tomato and paper, Moussaka. According to my history lesson, Geek likes Persian since one of our Prince married one of their king in two thousand and something years ago. So we are friends since then.

I should say it here that the best part of Greece is Greek :) They are just lovely and friendly. Greek barbecue is the best barbecue ever. They make best food which is not just meat and of course there is Greek music and dance.

I also learned the Greek alphabet there. It is so fun to read in Greek.

2010-06-21T02:17:00.002+04:30

There is no resurrection. I woke up of death. In my dream, I sorted everything out. So I woke up tired. Sorting out the whole resurrection thing was easy, making a decision about whether to resurrect or not was such a complex process. That was such a complex process that had nothing to with Bayesian inference.

2010-06-01T19:20:00.003+04:30

A couple of hours passed and I forget what I was going to write here.
"the stone"
But, I remember my alarm betrayed me today morning.
"some may hold the rose some hold the rope" and the rope holds my roses and I dry them.

Whatever is written up to now was yesterday. Now is today, I just read what I wrote yesterday. still cannot remember what I was going to write yesterday. The ugly french guy just offered me pastries. That was a big basket of pastry. I saw the big pastry basket. I did not look at any of pastry though, I just picked the one that closest to me in geography of pastry basket. Choice is overrated.

I am pretty enjoying listening to this and I like the way the word Long is a verb.

2010-05-28T04:15:00.005+04:30

First, being treated like a coffee break, makes you feel to be like a task in schedule list. Not even independent task, you are a task that is gonna be check marked with caffeine injection task.

First, you know this world is real and life depends on the caffeine. With all computational complexity and nerdy computer science bullshit which are so not you, you respect the parallel processing and being check marked as you are sipping the coffee.

Next, being treated like a wast of time since you are leaving in 10 weeks and I am not gonna be here in July. Being surprise by the fact of this world is for sure real.

Next, you even do not wanna know anymore. let's bury all the knowledge. Knowledge is pervasive. There is always too much information. Knowing is like a coming to this world. We do not have choice or control.

Then, who knows about then? then is fucking future. I am not here to predict. I am just here to support grammatical mistake and miss-spelling.

Then, I for sure know but I do not give a damn shit.

2010-05-08T23:06:00.004+04:30

White color,
too bright,
fluorescent light,
here is where you dislike.
Vivid music
black hat coffee,
walls are window, and still the fluorescent light,
as I like and as you detest.
When I am up in the air over the Océan Atlantique,
clouds are fluorescent light.
I am looking for a giant white arctic bear.
There it is a small little spring in the field of clouds.
Is it a hole there?
Yes, it is, it is whole you can see and an umbrella pastry.

2010-05-03T16:15:00.002+04:30

Forgetting the shit that you know by HEART(in caps letters), forgetting the shit that you should knowingly know it so as to be a part of you
is like the devastating moments of looking for an item that you are holding in your hand.

2010-03-31T17:21:00.000+04:30

Historical center is more than churches with half naked Jesus and fully cover Maria images, sometimes you can find museums, castles, and palaces.

2010-02-16T03:43:00.002+03:30

Jesus Christ, how to define noise and what is music?
it is so complex that makes me even say Jesus Christ and micro blog about that here !

2010-02-12T18:44:00.004+03:30

All they contribute to this world is the shit they flush out in loo.
And now a days toilet light has timer. So they just have very limited time to accomplish their contribution.

2010-02-12T18:36:00.003+03:30

My dreams are out of control. They are just so weird or dark. Some are weird with sci-fi touch. Some are dark with use of visual effects.

2010-02-04T04:37:00.003+03:30

Dedicated to the commercial pop singer who really bother me by being herself (ie trying to be every others)
They said these human-like creatures are really human. I said wow. I still cannot believe that though. I still kind of doubtful about that. We are so scientifically advanced so it is of course possible that they our man made. If not they are for sure human-like aliens who come with their extraterritorial voices to alienate us.

ps. I think artist or called artist should cite and acknowledge others

2010-01-24T06:37:00.002+03:30

life philosophy : We are all dying anyway.

btw, further to fish I am kind of obsess with philosophy of life.

2010-01-18T01:41:00.011+03:30

Well, we are not living under a same roof. There are too many roofs. So lets make sky our roof. Sky is finite. However, between us there are walls. There are many walls and walls are fractal.
Life is happier if we can share the roof even when walls are fractal. Sky is cloudy and gray. And it rains and rains and rains. Rain is a good thing I believe. but not when the sky is cloudy and gray. Clouds are fractal and winter does not feel like a winter. So, I am looking for flowers in flower shops.
Yah, and life is postponed. Life is epistemic. Ontology is nonsense and Buddhism is smart. Sometimes everything is makes more sense when they are Persian. Even only Tehran is really matter and nothing more. Also I sometimes envy American becuase of their adaptation, acceptance, and positive manners.
And liberate your mind. "Ideas are fractal". It has been while that I am graving to live in an island for at most three months and gain my living with other things not science. Let see when it will happen. I am not saying not doing science though.

2010-01-09T04:01:00.002+03:30

He said she is sexy.
I replied cleavage is sexy.

2010-01-04T21:01:00.001+03:30

Vacation is over, main goal is no more barking.
but it is again start of the same faces, same voices, same coffee, same gestures, same coffee break hours, same people, same coffee line, same smells, same paths, same pastry, at least the prices are varied sometimes.
I think of a stabilizing selection and I feel like a shark.
I look at all the sick things around, sick talk, sick walk, sick gestures, sick start, sick smile, sick end. I ate a cheep chocolate moose and feel sick.

2010-01-02T07:11:00.004+03:30

With all of my respect to drug dealers from all over the world,
with my deepest sorrow for all the misused words and vulgar concepts,
I sigh for bullshit philosophy, it is in a top three list of misused word and vulgar concepts.

With my mocking smile to all of ridiculous philosophers, journalists, social scientists whatever loathsome eloquent people who try to do the act of cool,
I mumble they are none.

The word intellectuality rebelled. So stop kicking out a striping intellectual from the dance floor.

We should all deprived of the word independent!
Pitiable word in the list. Poor word is an adjective. so all kind of art words tangles to it. intellectual smuggler likes it a lot.

I silenced the word freedom and I try to figure that out how many times a day I use the word retarded.

2009-12-26T16:10:00.003+03:30

A Brazilian guy said if he was a girl, he would be a bitch. Yah, he said he would be a bitch for sure. He suddenly sigh with a contemplative eye and said but, he could not do anything if he did not have a dick. He was dramatizing the disaster of not having a dick by some sort of loud thought talking. So, other dudes try to calm him down by showing him other options. But, he kept repeating he could not do anything if he did not have a dick. Finally a Turkish guy started to explain him that he did not need to have a dick if he was a girl since he could get as much as dick he wanted!

2009-12-23T00:30:00.003+03:30

An old bold short guy was smoking his pipe, passed me in train station.
Ugly french guy kept talking gibberish to me in Portuguese. Well, he is not ugly. He is actually kind of handsome. I used ugly just for the rhyme and readers' excitement. Yeah, the ugly french guy even say goodbye to me in Portuguese. This part was not gibberish I know how to say goodbye in Portuguese. So, I replied him "have a good night" and he looked super confused at door and left!

2009-12-15T15:24:00.003+03:30

I used to eat three or two meals every day. But, I changed. So, first, I ate once a day. Now, I just eat one day of a week. Then, I will eat one week for a month. Next, I will eat one month for a whole year. And then I will become a camel.

2009-11-22T22:15:00.002+03:30

Well, I am gonna write about how I feel when all of the sudden, a random person in the social network of strangers who is connected to me by a coffee relationship , asks me "what movies do you like?"
First, I endure the silence brought by the question. It seems everyone eagerly stops talking to hear my answer. I feel the bear of my silence too. So I take a sip of my coffee, while I say to myself why "in hell it should be important to this people what movie do I like?" We are not ever going to watch the movies together for sure. Well, I am not privacy freak, I do not mind showing my medical records to everyone. Then, all sort of answer come to mind, "should I give them the genre? should I give them the name of the directors? should I give them some names?"
Finally, I put a saucer over my cup and tell them I watch all sort of movies. There are some I prefer more though.

2009-11-19T20:51:00.004+03:30

It is Thursday afternoon. I am still on my Monday make up. It is strange to see how it vanishes. I actually like it better when it reaches the end of the week.
It itself erases in a beautiful way. There are many things that they never erase. They may be forgotten but they are still there.
Recently, I am reading about memory cells in our immune system. There is death rate for them. But, I still do not know how it really works. there are many theories and hypothesis. There are many mice bread every day to help the science progress. But we are not changing the world here. We are just playing around. The fact of being scientist as profession bothers me sometimes. We are not changing the world here. We are not necessarily making it a better place. Maybe some of us do. But, for many of us it is just something that we enjoy doing it. It is just something that satisfies our ego. Sadly, for some of us it is a "path of least resistance".
Anyway, I am still in my Monday make up and amazed by how nicely it erases. I wish other things can erase themselves. I wish I can erase things. It is hard or impossible to get over many things when they are still there. likewise, it is hard to be disconnected. It is harder to not to know the things that you do not want to know.

2009-11-15T19:05:00.002+03:30

For the records :
I found my first gray hair on Nov 6
I went to Estoril to buy a ticket on Nov 13 to watch "Un prophete" on Nov 15.
I found out "Un prophete" showod on Nov 14 very late night on Nov 14.
I found out my Portuguese visa is a piece of crap on Nov 15.

2009-10-26T19:43:00.002+03:30

I watched some of the documentary in Lisbon documentary festival. My impression is that the most parts of the world is kind of fucked up. I am still surprised about Russia situation. It means that I should read more because fucked up situation in Russia should not be surprising. Chinese documentary was incredible too. It sounds funny but their level dictatorship is really advance. Also people looks more determined and stronger than our nation. Our governments are learning I guess but not our nation.
Anyway this thing makes me feel that having underground music or covering the hair in the public are not even really big deal. I sometimes think that we know something is wrong, but we sadly forget what is really wrong.
Well another funny statement, at least we can chew gum in public and nobody is going to blood test us when we are coming back to our country to see if we used drug or not. (In Singapore they do)

2009-09-11T04:25:00.001+04:30

چشمانم را می بندم
تصاویر می لرزند

2009-08-19T23:48:00.001+04:30

به دلتنگی عادت کرده ام
به قطره اشک جمع شده در گوشه چشم
این بار هم می دانم
دلم برای که تنگ شده است
سلام که می کنی
دلم برای خداحافظی تنگ می شود
خواسته ام
بودن توست
دلم برای خواستن تنگ شده است
محو می شوی
هم چهره و هم آوایت

2009-08-18T01:02:00.000+04:30

بودنم اوج دیگر خواهی ست

زندگی بی رنگ است
بی رنگ

2009-08-14T04:35:00.002+04:30

I am too much Persian so I do not need "made in Iran" tag on me.

But, these people just think I am Italian when first they see me and think I am Israeli when they hear me!

2009-08-12T06:53:00.003+04:30

Universe with its all complexity has more important things to do. It does not even bother itself to know our existence as a humankind. we are just a limited value that is disappeared in its infinity.

we, humankind, have nothing worth mention to do. So we started to get are self busy discovering the universe. we have million approaches for that. we keep trying to answer the question "what is life?". we have not done defining a life yet, we move forward and start defining artificial life.
we keep evolving and trying to survive.
I just wonder is there an end point for evolution?

2009-08-10T05:05:00.002+04:30

There is a couple of people that I wish to be impolite enough to answer them like.

Que:How are you doing? or Are you fine?

Ans: Does it really matter?

btw, i know i am more than enough impolite but not in every context !

2009-08-07T09:47:00.002+04:30

getting ready to go fishing is much more exciting than fishing.
actually I should say fishing is boring! (as boring as playing golf!)
I should also mention that Americans are the best people in the world, they just have terrible taste in movies.

2009-07-27T02:59:00.002+04:30

I am sitting here, outside,

sky has its nice clouds today,

puppy likes me,

I like the puppy too,

but, inside just smell like the dog's saliva,

so, I am sitting outside,

here it just smells like ashes and cigar,

maybe my nose is so sensitive,

well the door is open,

the puppy is out!

2009-06-22T08:20:00.000+04:30

You bustard, taught me how to cry,
Can you hear it?
Why do not you listen to it?

You bustard, sprinkle blood over me,
I was in my mint colored custom,
It is black now,
Can you see it?
Why do not you look at it?

You bastard, brought your bloody violence to the street that I always love,
I was prepared to celebrate the victory of hope,
Now, I am hearing the hope still silently marches on the street that you never own,
Now, I am looking at you beating the hope that never defeats.
Now, I am looking at you trying to kill the hope that never dies.
You bastard, remember the time that I ask:
Why cannot you see the tears?
Why cannot you hear the groan?

2009-06-13T12:32:00.000+04:30

Like the sad moments of denying happiness
Experiencing dead momentary in void space of dust
Drinking wine is a waste of time
I am asking those musical images: Does such a thing exist that is called happiness?
They remind me “And happy is the flirting that you begin"

2009-06-09T09:09:00.002+04:30

Spinning and flying
Higher and higher
To a place where the rainbow flowers grow
Spinning and spinging
I always carry my whisky in a transparent bag
Flying and flying
Can you hold my wings?

It was so dark in the corner of that alley
We started with apple
I smelt the rainbow flower
Music cursed us
The Apple had gone
We got lost in noise
That was rainbow color light that blessed the island of lost people
We were spinning and flying
Higher and higher
To the end
To the start

2009-04-25T02:10:00.001+04:30

و نگاه تو را

در لابه لای خطوط

جست و جو می کنم
به کلمات خیره می شوم

کلمات بر من چشم

می بندم

2009-04-24T00:45:00.000+04:30

خستگی هایم را ورق می زنم
در روزگاری
که خستگی
نوشته نمی شود
در هیچ دفتری

2009-04-22T00:41:00.000+04:30

2009-04-09T09:09:00.000+04:30

The Song of the Barren Orange Tree

"Woodcutter.
Cut my shadow from me.
Free me from the torment
of being without fruit.

Why was I born among mirrors?
Day goes round and round me.
The night copies me
in all its stars.

I want to live without my reflection.
And then let me dream
that ants and thistledown
are my leaves and my parrots."

2008-12-29T03:06:00.002+03:30

I like Indiana weather, It can always surprised you.
It teach you to be ready for unexpected. You cannot even trust the weather forecast. You should be always ready for -20, wind and storm, 20 in a day after icy night, rain and every things.
I have just missed the snow and white.
but, I learn to be ready for unexpected.
I learn not to trust even when I see things with my own eyes. (this is not true)
I have been studying trust for two years, so, when ever I used trust as general term in a statement, you can be sure that statement is false.

2008-12-12T08:33:00.002+03:30

I do not know why I am not interested in many things that others are interested.
something's wrong with me.
I do not know why I am most of the time argue about everything.
something's wrong with me.
I do not know why I criticize everything very frankly.
I am screwed.
I do not know why some peoples bother me,
people,
people,
people.
people with their words, their manner, their activities.
something's wrong with me.
words bothers me the most. words and phrases, and whole nonsensical semantics of language.
I need to learn a new language.

2008-12-11T01:41:00.000+03:30

When I am walking, I am blogging.

2008-11-25T00:20:00.003+03:30

I miss writing in Farsi. I need Persian font but I am not going to install windows on my Mac.
It's been a week that everything seems so damn nostalgic. I do not know why I find this feeling so weird.
I hated when there is possibilities.
Possibilities to see,
Possibilities to see the things,
Possibilities to see the things form different aspect,
Possibilities of being happy and being sad at same time,
Possibilities of headphone on my ear when other is talking.
I hate headphone;
But, sometimes I like isolation.
I hate when I do not understand,
I hate when there is you and there is me.
I hate when I feel so week and vulnerable.
I hate when there is justification for everything.
But, I am not someone with whole hatred sense inside.

2008-11-11T05:33:00.000+03:30

this post is never gonna get published.
Am I publishing a post here ?
I catch a cold but it is not the reason.
I feel I miss an asshole, not you, you are not the asshole.
and it is really hurt when you are not replying my email, not you, I mean the asshole.
I am in a "the song to say goodbye" mood, which is better than the strawberry field mood.
that is it, that is all about writing personal shit.
do not read this post, I am not publishing it.

2008-10-22T00:11:00.002+03:30

I am very sorry to say that. but, sometimes I feel (not think nor believe) only the fake self-confident is a door to success in every area !
let me correct my self instead of bullshiting here. some people are successful only because of their fake self-confident.

2008-08-09T11:34:00.001+04:30

آخرین روز قبرس است. در مورد قبرس بعدا توضیح می دهم.

آخرین هفته ایران خواهد بود.

همه چیز خیلی سریع اتفاق نیفتاد. همه چیز طبق برنامه بود و سر وقت. حالا یا من خیلی خوش شانس ام یا دوست و آشنای خوب زیاد دارم که دعاشان می گیرد : )

اما هر چه قدر هم که همه چیز سر وقت، پیش بینی شده و فکر شده باشد، باز هم واقعیت خودش رو ناگهانی به آدم به نشان می دهد و می گوید "من هستم، تو چه فکر می کنی؟" البته یک مقداریش تقصیر همین چیزهای فکر شده است که بخشی از آن را چیزهایی که نباید به آنها فکر تشخیص داده است.

2008-08-05T23:20:00.000+04:30

شهر مدرن، زندگی مدرن، اولین تصویر ذهنی من از این دو عبارت سرعت بالا، ساختمان های بلند، ترافیک، آلودگی صوتی، تعداد زیادی آدم تو پیاده روهای باریک، جریان 24 ساعته زندگی و چیزهای مشابه است. به نظرم این تصویر درست نیست (شاید هم فقط کامل نباشد، شهر مدرن و زندگی مدرن جنبه های دیگری هم دارد). حالا چه طوری در ذهن این تصویر معادل با این دو عبارت است، در حال بررسی است. ترجیح می دادم اولین تصویر ذهنیم توجهی هم به تکنولوژی روز، آرامش و آسایش داشته باشد.

البته الان فکر می کنم که اصولا این عبارت "شهر مدرن" عبارت درستی نیست. یعنی مدرن نمی تواند صفت شهر باشد.

2008-07-26T23:33:00.001+04:30

در دنیایی که در این گوشه ی جهان، اکنون ماست،

آن قدر سوژه فراوان است

که کتاب های زیادی بر تاریخ ادبیات افزوده خواهد شد،

از خفقان تصویر متحرک

تا ذهن های بهانه جوی مستعد به تنبلی

هر جمله که خوانده می شود

تلنگری است بر خط نستعلیق

در دنیایی که در این گوشه ی جهان، اکنون ماست،

مرگ بیش تر زنده است

مرگ زندگی می کند

مرگ از زندگان است

خسته از زندگان

جاودانگی خود را در کورسوهای امید جست و جو می کند.

زندگی که به مرگ جان می دهد

طفل خود را سر راه می گذارد.

زندگی که به مرگ جان می دهد

فراموش شده است.

2008-07-25T22:51:00.000+04:30

ظهر است و آفتابی،

درون این اتاق بی پنجره تاریک است،

چراغ ها را فقط در شب روشن می کنم،

عادت است دیگر،

شب ها به شوق دیدن دوباره معشوق به خواب می روم،

هر روز عاشق می شوم،

دیدگان معشوق را به بوسه فراموش می کنم،

دلم برای دلتنگی تنگ شده است،

دنیا پر است از عشق

از زیبایی

جای خالی

زود پر می شود،

هر روز عاشق می شوم،

دلم برای دلتنگی تنگ شده است،

معشوق ما خود عاشق بود

و ما به وعده تلخ نگاه لبخند

عشق معشوق راهدیه می دادیم

"روزگاز غریبی است نازین"

ما کجاییم و

چه می کنیم و

چه می خواهیم

این سنگینی خواست های کیست

که بر دیوار ما سوار است

این سنگینی که مرکب خود را ویران نمی کند

فرمان می دهد و

و پنهان اش می کند.

2008-04-04T00:58:00.000+04:30

Archiving my life,

Smoking the web pages,

Archiving your life

Memorize me,

Memorizing you,

It is all about memory,

And maybe you do not have enough space to store the web

But you can smoke all the web pages,

There exists the all complexity in memory,

Memory are distributed in many dimension

Here there is a time dimension,

And there is a location dimension,

And there is a history behind everything

Just, Smoke the web pages,

Time itself has many dimensions, either the location

Location also has directions,

Time is lost,

Smoke the space,

Time is dust

And there is limitation in location with all of its directions

Find an ashtray in infinity

Smoke the web pages

2008-04-03T16:37:00.000+04:30

Shipment on hold,

Shipment arrived at incorrect facility.

Clearance Delay,

It has been 10 days,

Seem at least 7 days remain,

So, I have just can say some words, bad words but not very bad one, actually curse, in Farsi

2008-04-02T02:03:00.000+04:30

خوب، من باید به شهر نیورک بروم و وودی آلن را ببینم. وودی آلن یکی از هنرمندهای نابغه ای که از کلی سال قبل از تولد من بوده و هنوز هست. اگر بمیرد من واقعا ناراحت می شوم. آخر تحمل کم شدن یک نابقه هنرمند با سابقه واقعا سخت است.

خوب، وودی آلن از کلی سال قبل تولد من شروع به هنرآفرینی کرد و خیلی ها فهمیدن که او نابغه است یا نابقه. خیلی فوق العاده است که در نسل های مختلف زندگی کنی و برای همه شان هنر آفرینی کنی و فسیل نشوی. وقتی کارهای وودی آلن رو پشت سر هم می بینی، انگار تاریخ است که دارد ورق می خورد با یک عینک همیشگی. اوه، می دانید این کار فقط از یک نابغه برمی آید. خوب معلوم است که نابغه درست است و نه نابقه. یک نابغه که زنده بموند و نکشندش و یا در اثر زیاده روی در مصرف هروئین نمیرد.

خوب، واقعا ارزشش را دارد که من بروم نیورک. من این روزها خیلی نگرانم. آخر وودی آلن دیگر خیلی پیر شده است و ممکن است یک وقت که دارد از پله ها بالا می رود، یک دفعه زمین بخورد.

حالا شما هرچی هم که انگشت تان را به سمت اش بگیرید و بگویید که با دختر خوانده زن قبلی اش رو هم ریخته، من باز هم می گویم که باید نیورک. می خواهم آن ساختمان را هم از نزدیک ببینم. قول می دهم که اصلا هم موزه نروم. موزه رفتن در نیورک دیگر کلیشه شده است. ولی آن مجسمه را هم حتما می خواهم ببینم. آزادی که حد و مرزی ندارد، فقط برای اثبات آزاد بودن نباید آزادی دیگران را محدود کرد. وودی آلن آزاد است. آزادی کسی را هم نگرفته است.

گفتم که وودی آلن یک نابغه است. تا حالا به جمله هایی که می سازد دقت کردید. خوب منظورم حرف هایی که می زند، دیالوگ هایی که می نویسد. آره، همان جمله ها، همان ترکیب فوق العاده کلمه ها. یک جمله وقتی فوق العاده می شود که به زبان وابسته نباشد. آره، ترجمه را می گویم. تا حالا شده نتوانید یک جمله را از یک زبان به زبان دیگر ترجمه کنید؟ یا مثلا برای ترجمه یک جمله مجبور جمله را عوض کنید تا معنا را برسانید. این یک نوع ناکاملی در آن جمله است. یک ناکاملی که باعث می شود جمله فوق العاده نباشد. به جمله های وودی آلن دقت کنید، آنها فوق العاده اند. پس می بینید من باید بروم حتما به شهر نیورک بروم.

2008-03-07T02:20:00.001+03:30

فک کنم دیگر کسی تو تهرون نمونده باشه (از نسل جوان البته) که سنتوری را ندیده باشه،

خوب بهتر بود بیشتر این فیلمو پدر و مادرا می دیدن،

راستش این فیلم یه جاش میلنگه، اونم این که داره توجیه می کنه، مقصر را نشان می دهد و توجیه می کنه،

تا وقتی هم که توجیه وجود دارد، می تونید برید و هر کاری می خواید بکنید،

باید فقط علت را می گفت، نه این که توجیه می کرد.

2008-03-02T23:13:00.000+03:30

tuneful melodies,
I am overloaded with the songs which are perfectly in tune.
happy and relax,
tune up your instrument and play,
and I will fly out of sky.

2008-02-29T01:44:00.000+03:30

Woman,

The one to play the role of beloved one,

The beautiful one with smell of heaven.

Woman,

The kindhearted,

Responsible to forget the unfaithfulness, forgive and stay.

Woman,

The eternal victim of cultural heritage,

Very polite and gentle.

Woman,

The magical attraction,

The one to show,

The one to hide.

Woman,

Carrier of unbearable burden of conditions

Even there are equivalent rights.

2008-02-28T23:03:00.000+03:30

خسته،

مریض،

چرخنده،

نه بگویید، برای من قابل درک تر است.

2008-02-21T20:07:00.000+03:30

ذهن ام گسسته است،

همه چیز در صف پشت سر هم قرار گرفته اند،

گه گاه چیزی از چیز دیگر پیش می گیرد،

صف تغییر می کند،

دیگر از استرس و هیجان هم

فقط تپش قلب اش باقی مانده،

شاید هم من اینقدر متوجه قلب ام شده ام

که چیز دیگری را حس نمی کنم،

همه چیز همان طور که باید پشت سرهم انجام می شود،

فقط گه گاه چیزی از چیز دیگر پیش می گیرد،

و یا چیز دیگری این وسط اضافه می شود،

من که نمی توانم همه چیز را پیش بینی کنم،

من منتظر چیزهای پیش بینی نشده می مانم،

کران بی کرانه آن قدر دور است،

که دیده نمی شود

فقط گه گاه چیزی آن را نزدیک تر و یا دورتر می کند.

2008-02-10T23:42:00.000+03:30

لطفا در کتاب های مربوط به انقلاب ها، رخداد بیست و نه سال پیش خاک سفید رنگ ایران زمین را به عنوان تنها موردی که به جک و خنده برای همه تبدیل شده است وارد کنید.

یک آهنگ هیپ و هاپ انقلابی هم بخوانید دیگر تکمیل می شود.

2008-02-08T17:09:00.000+03:30

-Believe me, ugly girl has many other things to offer further to their comic self-confidence and make up.

+ I do not say she is ugly.

-No need to say.

+ I am just wondering what is interesting for you to see other people try hard to catch you easily.

2008-02-05T23:51:00.000+03:30

Fake

The shadow in dark

Formed

By the dim light of the lamp

Void

A gift of to be doomed

To prepare for

Celebration of existence in the world of nothingness

2008-01-18T01:49:00.000+03:30

آتش را از تاج خروس ها گدایی می کنیم

همه جا را دود گرفته است

آتش

به غلط است

و دود

و کنده های نم کشیده

ما در و سط آتش ایم

و دود می کنیم

نم کشیده ایم

2008-01-07T00:22:00.000+03:30

Soon as the day begins, it starts to get over.

I am over.

2007-12-28T15:16:00.000+03:30

"بیچاره ماهی ها...

گناه ماهی ها چه می تواند باشد

که دریا به این اندازه بزرگ است

کدام نیرو آنها را از این آزادی نفرت انگیز

رها خواهد ساخت؟"

رخنه های امکان (مجموعه شعر)

ستاره علیرضایی

نشر ثالث

چاپ اول 1386

2007-12-20T22:27:00.000+03:30

نه این می شوم و نه آن می شوم

نتیجه شعر کارو تلخ است

هیچ می شوم

تاریخ بودن مسیر خود را در سیاره ای دیگر پیدا خواهد کرد

سیاره ای که تحت کنترل نیروی جانب مرکز نباشد

سیاره ای که مرگ اش را پیش بینی نکنند.

مرگی که پیش بینی شود

دیگر مرگ نیست

زوال است

تاریخ بودن مسیر خود را در سیاره ای دیگر دنبال خواهد کرد

سیاره ای که زوال نیابد

و زوال را آموزش ندهد

سیاره بدون هپروت و خلسه

که هست و نیست در آن تنها دو چیز است

نه دو چیزها

2007-12-18T23:21:00.000+03:30

متنفر می شوید از همه آن ها که من را آزرده اند.

نزول به اوج می رسد،

تجسم فضایی اش کمی مشکل است،

زمین را به سقف آسمان نکوبید،

آن جا که خدا خفته است.

نزول یک مفهوم نسبی است

و اوج هم.

به نزول و اوج با تابع تفسیر در هر قلمرو هم که معنا بدهید

اشتراک معانی تهی خواهد بود.

نزول را به اوج رسانده اند،

هنر می خواهد.

2007-12-15T21:11:00.000+03:30

به دنبال زغال می گردم، اما فقط جعبه مداد هایم را پیدا می کنم.

تیغ، خط کش و مقوایی که ته رنگ کرم به خود گرفته است.

نه، کاغذ نمی خواهم، به بافت مقوا احتیاج دارم.

تصویر زیبای ذهن ام رنگ آ رنگ است.

رنگ می بازد و بر مقوا می نشیند.

دست من ضعیف شده است.

طیف های گونه گونه تک رنگ مداد هایم بر هم چیره می شوند.

این ضعف تکنیکی است،

تکنیک شرط لازم هنر است. تکنیک ابزار هنر است. نفی اش نکنید.

من به یاد می آورم که بارها پست مدرنیسم توجیه ضعف ها و بی هوده گی ها بوده است.

من به یاد می آورم که بارها پست مدرنیسم در هنر نقش بی نهایت ریاضی را بازی کرده است. آن جا که معلوم نیست چیست و قرار است همه چیزهای نامعلوم در آن مشخص شود.

2007-12-14T22:37:00.000+03:30

Dance me to your rhythm

There is no rhyme in words,

Just be a picture,

Let me stare at you and adore the picture.

2007-12-08T21:55:00.000+03:30

“I do not have to be good, because they think I am going to be good,” Richard Feynman said.

“Honors bother me,” Richard Feynman said when he answered was his work worth noble prize?

Actually, He said several other things to complete that sentence. It is better to see yourself when he described it.

2007-12-06T22:21:00.000+03:30

انجام کارهای احقمانه

من که به کمال رساندم

تصمیم های احقانه

جاهای احمقانه

البته دیدید که

من فقط خودم را می بینم و زمان را

رفتن به جاهایی که متنفر بشویم

آخر مشکل فیلترینگ که حل شده

مشکل مانتوهای کوتاه هم که به لطف پالتوهای بلند فصل سرما حل شده،

از آب های مرزی هم که چیزی به این ملت نمی ماسد

این مردم یا این که بالاخره می فهمند و صدایی ازشان در می آید

یا این که ... ... (دیگر خیلی بی ادبی بود، من ام که آن بالا توصیه به بازدیدکننده گان نزدم مگر نه اصلا سانسور و این حرف که معنی ندارد)

من که فقط زمان را می بینم و

گور پدر مکان هم کرده

حالا که چی، هم این که

این هدف لعنتی

هیچ چیز

روشنی

در آن

نیست

برای رفع ابهام بگویم که روشن متضاد تاریک است.

روشنی نیاز به تعریف ندارد.

این تجربه های پی در پی

تاثیر

خودش را در همه من

و در همه زمان من

می گذارد

و من دیگر نمی دانم

که این روح است که جسم را یدک می کشد

یا جسم است که روح را سوار بر خود می برد.

2007-12-06T14:44:00.000+03:30

Talking about existence,

There is me and there is 3 o’clock in the afternoon.

2007-11-30T16:37:00.000+03:30

I know you all from inside. I see what goes around. But, you portray yourself as someone different. I accept you and your disguise. I treat you as your portrait want. It seems better for everyone.

And I try to mange myself, control myself, and behave myself. But, I let my figurative face to be free. Thus, you can easily figure me out.

2007-11-24T21:12:00.000+03:30

شب هایی که تا سپیده صبح نمی شود

تا دو راهی تردید یک راه نشود

راه من که مشخص بود

راه، خود با دیگر راه یکی شد

دو راهی تردید را قبل خود شکل داد

من مبهوت ، از وسط راه بیرون نشستم

تا شگفتی کابوس شبانه ام تکرار نشود

2007-11-19T18:58:00.000+03:30

کره زمین ابتدا همه اش آب بود و آب

و حالا همه اش جنگل شده است

قانون بقا در جزء جزء شهر هایش رخنه کرده

و این قدرت لعنتی

که معلوم نیست چه طور تعریف می شود

تابعیت می خواهد

و این قدرت جنگلی

و این خط اخمی که پیشانی مرا نوازش می کند

به هم عادت نمی کنند که نمی کنند

2007-11-15T09:13:00.000+03:30

ترافیک را قدم می زنم،

کوله بارم را خمیازه می کشم،

جوانی بلند آواز می خواند،

و با چشمانی که کم کم تاریک می شود،

خلوت دو نفر در صندلی پشتی را بر هم می زنم،

و آنها بهانه ای برای نزدیک تر شدن پیدا می کنند.

2007-11-12T19:07:00.000+03:30

just a mixture of some lines

If I could escape
And re-create a place as my own world
I guess I would felt alright.
But it hurts when I think,
the map of the world is on me
the moon gravitates around me
the seasons escape me.
so, I wanna make it worth the fight
and I never was, never was one for lying

now wouldn't that be sweet?

2007-11-06T15:03:00.001+03:30

We are all under the rain but I miss autumn rain.

What is wrong with the weather? It just keeps shining on us; maybe, we are crazy old diamonds.

2007-11-01T10:13:00.000+03:30

No time left to waste and No thing worth spending time for it.

I get control of my mind and mentality; thus, I concentrate it above my head. Furthermore, I define it a limited space. It ,my mind, used to wander around and interfere in any issues. It used to be so powerful and do whatever it wants. Nevertheless, I am too busy now; I need it all focuses on my thesis.

2007-10-28T22:45:00.000+03:30

این برای لی لا ی عزیز،

یک کلمه را دفعه قبل براش اشتباه خوندم، حافظه ام هم هندلی شده دیگه : ))

"کاش دل تنگی نیز نام کوچکی می داشت

تا به جان اش می خواندی:

نام کوچکی

تا به مهر آوازش می دادی،

هم چون مرگ

که نام کوچک زنده گی است"

پی نوشت: راستی تو که منو همین دیروز دیدی. در ضمن دریا و باد هر دو پخش کننده هستند، دلتنگی به عنصر چهارم احتیاج داره : )

2007-10-28T22:41:00.000+03:30

بهتر جدیش نکنیم ، آخه من خیلی غیرتیم، می فهمی که،

تو هم که اصولا به هیولاهای سکسی علاقه داری.

2007-10-24T14:28:00.000+03:30

ما امروز با کفش های فضایی مان به سرزمین بادهای هوایی-زمینی وارد شدیم. باد های هوایی-زمینی، بادهای سردی هستند که از زمین با فشار به سمت بالا خارج می شوند و تا جایی که جاذبه راه بده به سمت بالا حرکت می کنند. اما باز هم دیوار های تودرتو سرزمین بادهای هوایی-زمینی داغ داغ هستند. فقط چند تا مدل فلیپینی، دوربین حرفه ای و پایه کم داشتیم، مگر نه ماه بعد گالری ما پر از شما هایی بود که آمدین مقاومت مدل های فلیپینی در آن همه باد ببنید.